Trying to avoid the Blazers and failing miserably

Being a former Sonics fan and trying to watch NBA games this season has been unbelievably unsettling. It’s like flipping on the DVD player, thinking you’re going to watch the “Big Lebowski” for the 437th time, but unbeknownst to you someone slipped in a copy of your in-laws “birthing” video. Betrayal, confusion and ultimately a sick bag are all part of the experience.

The Portland Trail Blazers haven’t helped. They are a compelling team with a roster full of Seattle favorites and a second-year big man in Greg Oden who is starting to figure out the NBA game in his first full season after last year’s injury. Portland guard Brandon Roy will have his Washington Huskies number retired tonight in a pre-game ceremony at Hec Ed in Seattle. I bet Mr. Sonic and current Blazer head coach Nate McMillan will be there. As will Seattle high school standout and Portland guard Martell Webster. Cripes, Seahawks and Blazers owner Paul Allen may even be in the house. It’s getting very difficult not to watch these guys. I actually found myself looking for the Cavs/Blazers game on TV last night.

Readers of this space know that I married into Red Sox nation - bummer. Well, I also married into Blazers … nation or whatever they call themselves … as well. I’ve caught Mrs. Mitten watching reruns of Portland 1977 playoff run on Comcast Sports Channel. Disgusting. No front-running here. Before my head hits the pillow I’ve had to endure comments like “Hey, Oden finally scored more than 20 points tonight.” Trying to adopt a team that isn’t Portland has been an unmitigated disaster. I attempted to follow the Los Angeles Clippers for about 23 minutes. They’re terrible.

Following the Thunder is worse. If you’d like to really lash out, there are a number of blogs and Web sites where you can unload. You can find a few in the right-hand column of this page. You can always go to the Daily Oklahoman to check in with the Oklahoma City Thunder. Reading their coverage of the team is like perusing the sports section of your local high school newspaper. With such sugary high praise you’d think the Blunder were on their way to winning 70 games this season. But they’re not, OKC is 9-34. I guess it doesn’t help them that Thunder owner Clay Bennett’s wife’s family owns the paper.

And to top it all off, there aren’t a lot of happy thoughts emanating from Olympia these days when the topic of KeyArena comes up. Legislators and politicians are staring down the barrel of a crippled economy and sky-high unemployment. For the first time ever, Microsoft announced a massive layoff today. Boeing is cutting people, WaMu is dead. Approving legislation to set aside tax money, no matter where it comes from, for a future NBA team will be viewed as political suicide.

So, as the season sails along with no NBA solution in sight for Seattle, the sirens song of the Portland Trail Blazers will continue to wear us down. Baseball season can’t arrive soon enough.